Today is father's day. Therefore, I have prepared the most appropriate and loving gift a daughter can give to her father to show her appreciation for his (lack of) parenting.

Yup, he got a coconut.

Context: For the past six months or so, I have been doing my best to drive my parents up the wall by singing the coconut song at every available opportunity. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the coconut song, it goes as follows:

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts
(Diddly diddly)
There they are all standing in a row
(Bom bom bom)
Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head
Give 'em a twist, a flick of the wrist
That's what the showman said
Hey!

I am proud to say that all I have to do is say "coconut" or start humming this particular tune and my parents will both start shouting over me in an effort to stop me singing it, or at least stop them from hearing it.

Ah, sweet success.